I'm Rather Pissed

Perhaps I shouldn't be.  I don't know.  It was really nice and unexpected to get a sexy text from Shelly tonight saying how horny she was and she was going to need some tonight.  Then she gets home and says she's tired and "don't make too long".  Then of course I pull the "going soft" trick and just give up.  Of course she's not bothered.  She can just get fucked elsewhere.  So does she show any concern?  None whatsoever.  That makes me feel really great.  I tell you what.  I'm ready to get this house shit done and over with and past us, me provide an income and have some leverage.  Of course, by then - who knows.  I must admit I have no clue at all how this shit is going to turn out.  I have no clue what's going on, I couldn't tell you what's going to happen tomorrow much less next month or the month after that.  Sometimes I just want to fucking scream, hop in a vehicle and just drive until I run out of gas and money and just jump off a fucking cliff and get it over with.