So, here we are. Basically 6 weeks since the Labor day incident and 4 weeks since the "incident" and exactly 4 weeks ago tonight that we decided to work things out.
It certainly has been up and down. A lot of my insecurity initially came from reading texts or IMs to and from Shelly with him. Then came the wonderful outing to the Dennis DeYoung concert. I think it was perhaps, in some ways, the most romantic and wonderful time we have ever had together. Then the Saturday night disaster. I have to admit, I'm pretty sure it was mostly my fault. I think I had probably agreed when allowing "unlimited" that it included him...somehow, even when she went out Wednesday...I was thinking that it didn't. I don't know - either way, it was a miscommunication. Honesty and communication are going to be the keys. Also, me overcoming insecurities by improving myself in a lot of ways - employment, workouts/weight loss/teeth/hygiene/etc. I still think she could have been a little more forthcoming about the visit down there, but I'll overlook it.
What's really hard is how mad I was yesterday...Both of us. Although I think it's the first time that we have actually been together while it was going on. The other time it was while she was at work two weeks ago and she went over "there" and by the time she came home Wednesday all was good. Perhaps I had forgotten how sick to my stomach I was that whole day and evening...although some of it was anger...most of it was sadness. Most of it to this day has been sadness, sick to your gut type of feeling. Yesterday was more anger, and it kind of took her off the pedestal I've had her on for 6 weeks. Hopefully I'll get it back.
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